Royal Bating. Prince William Saxa Coburg Goethe Spencer was sent out on do-gooding duty yesterday after his stint of state sponsored big ticket joyriding in a helicopter landed him in hot water with the queen. As punishment for his abusive idiocy the king in waiting was sent to accompany his brother on a visit to a military hospital where they hooked up with a Royal Marine who had lost both legs treading on a landmine on Afghanistan. As this would counter the negative publicity garnered by his reckless stunt.
Shorty before leaving for the hospital the prince was, allegedly, heard to strop at the queen "Wait till I'm King, granny! Then I won't have to do this crap."
Prince Harry, who is rewriting his dire public image on the back of military service did not tread on any landmines while in Afghanistan, and still has the use of all his limbs, when sober. Some guys get all the luck. Some get born into the landed and ruling classes, and enjoy living a life of luxury at the expense of the British taxpayer. Others step on a landmine, and then get patronised by toffs.
"You're the real hero" spurted Harry. Who maybe is not so eager to get back in the frontline now.
"Could you do any handbrake skids in that?" 'Jibed' William, to a young soldier crippled for life, in a wheelchair. And everyone guffawed.
They walk the line those Princes. The thin line between being patronising imbeciles, and having the common touch. It won't rub with me, I am impervious to the hypnotism of pomp and would find offence in pretty much anything they said, as they 'block my sunshine'. I would like to know if the amputee enjoyed the joke though.
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2 comments:
The 'William landing helicopter in gf's garden' reminded me of the joke about the Jewish airline pilot who crashed a 747 into his brother's scrapyard.
"If only I had legs to kick you in your royal bollocks with..."
Would've been my line of choice.
Mine would have been "handbrake skids, no mate, I'm gonna land it in my girlfriend's backgarden."
Also- I could not help thinking that "landing a helicopter in his girlfriend's backgarden" was a euphemism for the act that dare not speak its name.
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